Irv Klepfurd

Irv Klepfurd was an employee of Path-E-Tech Management who spent his career stealing office supplies, even going as far to build his garage entirely from stolen paperclips. The Pointy-Haired Boss decided to punish him by humiliating him at his retirement ceremony, remarking on these facts. He then handed him a bill for the $87,000 worth of personal phone calls he made during his career, and slapped a sticky note with the current time to Irv's forehead, knocking him unconscious.